Sunday 21 October 2012

Jimmy Savile and the Problem of Abuse


Oh what a to-do.  Poor old Jimmy will be turning in his grave.  Well he will be  - literally - when they get their way and exhume him and move him to an unmarked grave.  It is all very pathetic really.  Tragic!  And I probably don't mean tragic in the way the mainstream of our culture would like to think it is tragic.

For many years now I have had a problem with abuse.  The problem seems to be that most people don't know what is wrong with abuse.  I did ask a lady from the Children Services once and the backlash was frightening.

Esther Rantzen expressed the view that she was distressed at how "we" failed to recognise what was going on to the point of possibly colluding with Jimmy Savile.  It appears that the world at large may turn on Esther in a scapegoat kind of way.  Esther should continue her good work and should be 'included' in the conversation about abuse and not 'blamed' or 'excluded'.  However I do have one observation about Esther's presented position and it is this;  "We" missed the signs because "we" don't understand what is wrong with abuse.  I get no indication from Esther's work or comments that she really understands what is so wrong with abuse and I get very little hint that anyone really understands what is wrong with abuse.

The general public consensus seems to be sentimental.  The mainstream view seems to be that abuse is wrong because it is distressing for the victim.  It is the pain that the victim suffers that we dislike and deem "wrong".  It is that slightly empathetic simulation of what the victim is feeling that we can recognise as unpleasant and we would not like to experience.  It seems to follow that it is, therefore, "wrong".  But this is not what is most importantly 'wrong' with abuse.  The pain and discomfort are unpleasant and it is perfectly human and reasonable to regard the experience as undesirable and to respond to that empathetic feeling by questioning it but it is not the 'reason' abuse is so wrong.  There are lots of things that are unpleasant that we don't deem wrong 'because' they are unpleasant.  Having a bad tooth extracted might be one example.

What is so worryingly 'wrong' about abuse is that it damages the person.  And it damages them in a way that perpetrates the abuse.  It damages the person in such a way as to prevent them functioning as well as they were functioning before.  Although we all suffer some degree of abuse in our lives and as humans we are quite robust and cope with a lot of damage it is the damage that makes us perform less successfully and in some cases prevents us functioning creatively and constructively at all.  But there is worse to come...  It turns people into abusers.  So, in some way, the problem with abuse is it creates abusers.  Abused people cannot, by definition, respond accurately to their environment.  They are malfunctioning and this is detrimental not only to their individual well being, which is important enough, but also to the well being of the society, the culture, and ultimately to the evolution of this particular sentient life form in this weird old universe of ours.

10 comments:

  1. Abuse occurs from people who are sick. It is a sickness. Not one that can be easily forgiven by the victims but a sickness none the less.

    The trick is, if you are abused as a child, to 'break the cycle'.

    The worst abusers are those who claim they were abused therefore went on to abuse.

    They are the biggest scum.

    Yes, a victim is forever aware of their victimhood and yes, it may make them struggle throughout their life in so many many ways but....

    ...to abuse as a former victim is unforgiveable.

    Personally I would shoot the bastards.

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    1. Ah you imposter. In short I would agree with you. It almost sounds from your response that we are in disagreement. Perhaps I didn't explain well enough. It is precisely the people who - perhaps unfortunately - do not oppose the things they 'know' to be wrong who consequently act out the abuse on others. I have no idea whether we have any 'choice' in the matter but that has nothing to do with the need to stop people who are abusing from continuing. I think my main point, that I will try to write about in another post, is that "DAMAGE" occurs and any "thing" that is damaged is, by definition, not working correctly. We live in an abusive culture and until we stop it at the source we will continue to have the likes of Esther Rantzen being amazed that nobody did anything about it at the time. It seems that the children who were abused were already 'abused' by the culture and so couldn't tell anyone. The few who did were "not believed". That is so abusive in itself.

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  2. I was beat a lot as a kid, but what the hell has that got to do with anything? Didn't beat my kids.

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    1. I guess that is like suggesting smoking is not bad for you because you know someone who lived to be 94 who smoked. And it seems to me you are close to suggesting that beating kids is acceptable because it "never did you any harm". If you chose not to beat your kids it suggests you didn't want to perpetrate the harm. I think some people don't get that opportunity. And please don't think I am 'defending' any abuser - It is more a case of too many kettles calling the pots black.

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  3. I think you think to fucking much about abuse and should just enjoy life the best you can.

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  4. No one gives a fuck if you think you was abused as a kid. You're an adult now, get with the fucking program.

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  5. You sound very hurt and very angry.

    No, you do when you keep carrying on about abuse, stop trying to be a fucking shrink, you suck at it.

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  6. I guess you and I are on different sides. It was you who said "I was beat a lot as a kid, but what the hell has that got to do with anything? Didn't beat my kids." You are clearly pandering to your ego and making yourself out to be the "nice Dad" but instead of dealing with your pain you are beating up on me.

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  7. Like I said, stop trying to be a fucking shrink, you suck at it. Never said I was a nice dad all the time, just said that I didn't beat my kids. So I was beat a lot, got the fuck over it a long time ago, this planet is always beating us up, center on today's beatings, fuck past beatings.

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